altogether
2015-02-25 @ 6:49 p.m.

i want to go somewhere that i can really marvel at something. i guess d.c. couldn't come at a better time. the idea of standing under monuments or sitting in front of renaissance paintings sounds really perfect. i remember growing up in middle school and high school i spent a lot of time to myself, a lot of reflection, a lot of analysis. i don't really get that anymore. even when i'm alone these days, and that's not often, i'm still not really alone long enough to sink into myself. or, i'm distracting myself with a book or tv so there are no thoughts to sink into. ¶ i wonder if i'm not observant nor aware of others feelings anymore because i stopped caring? i never meant for it to come to this. i only meant to not care what people think of me. i never wanted to stop caring altogether.